Why your beard is your wingman

Why your beard is your wingman


Who is that one person who you always take with you when you go out?

You go with the hope that you’re gonna score that night and that he’s gonna be your wingman.

You start talking to a hot chick at the bar telling her about how you’re in a band and everything.

All is well, and then your buddy comes along and says something like “Oh did you know? He loves

dancing so much that once when he was taking ballet lessons, he spun too fast, fell and broke his

hip! Ha ha ha.”

Yeahhh, that happened.

Needless to say, she walks away.

Then you walk up to another girl and before you can say anything, your buddy swoops in to be the

‘best wingman ever’ and says “Hey girl, you see this guy? You should see what’s under all that cloth.

Trust me, it’ll blow your mind!”

See where I’m going with this?

That’s why we say, fly solo. Well technically your beard is a part of you. ;)

So stick to the one who’s always gonna have your back.

The one who’s gonna make you the boss without you even uttering a word.

Yeah, your beard is your true wingman.

When you walk into a bar or a club, you don’t have to walk up to a woman and ask her if you can buy

her a drink. No no no, not when you have a beard. She’s gonna come up to you instead.

Even if you’re standing in an elevator and looking into your phone, your beard is probably having a

conversation with that lovely woman standing next to you and talking you up.

So, the next time you consider shaving your beard off, think about what we just said for a minute

and you’re gonna wanna break that goddamn piece of shit.

So #DumpTheRazor and start treating your only wingman they way he deserves to be!

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